Ok, so I know these 2 weaboo girls, who I’ll call Olivia and May. Olivia isn’t too weabooish compared to May so I’ll mainly talk about May. All you need to know about Olivia is that she’s abusive to her boyfriend (She would beat him if he didn’t attend anime club even though he couldn’t stand anime) and she is May’s future girlfriend/harem maker.

You all are so lucky that you don’t know May. May was obsessed with harems, yaoi, yuri, and Japan, like most weaboos. She also claimed that her father was a 5-star chef, mafia capo, AND worked for Nintendo, so she could have delicious food every day as well as tons of money and video games whenever she wanted. She wore the same dirty and wrinkled Haruhi Suzumiya and Naruto shirts every day, and called me lucky every time I bought a new manga and begged me to buy her snacks.

Then she began to wear a collar and call herself a “kawaii inu-chan” and use broken Japanese in every last sentence. (There’s a Japanese class at my school but she wouldn’t take it because it sounded too hard.) She is not in the least bit cute. She then had to have multiple hugs from everyone EVERY DAMN DAY, and began to smell like rotting onions, but I was too polite to let her know.

It got worse. In art class, she would make a shitty drawing of Kaname from Vampire Knight’s face on a piece of paper and turn it in for every art project. She began to talk nonstop about her “hot boyfriend in college” and “harem of 4 yaoi guys”.  Only 2 of her “harem” guys seemed to have names, and those were just anime nicknames, and I only saw one picture of her “boyfriend” which looked like a hot cosplayer off Google images. She even joined the LGBT/Straight alliance club for the sole purpose of trying to find real life yaoi. She also made up stories about her “super strength”.

The last straw was when I was writing a story for fun about the Lithuanian mafia. She read it and wanted her own Mary Sue character named Hime who was half-Japanese, had a pet wolf, (I called her out on that and she said that pet wolves were “realistic”) carried katanas, dressed super sexy, killed her mom, and wore a collar to keep her from going insane. Hime took over the entire story, and had a fiancé named Alexei who was a 100% Gary Stu plus they were in a Romeo and Juliet situation. I trashed those characters and later my story and that was the end of our friendship.

This year, my best friend and another friend of mine who I’ll call Molly and Mark fell into May’s trap, and May and Olivia began dating. (While each of them had a boyfriend on the side to boot.) They decided to form a harem. My best friend Molly is bi and has a girlfriend in the state to the east of my city. When May and Olivia found this out, they took this opportunity and decided to glomp her every day and try to flirt with her so she’d be in their harem. She refused politely because she was happy with her girlfriend and quite annoyed by them but they wouldn’t let up. Olivia now calls May “iku” (Come) and they decided that since Mark was nice and bi-curious, they’d turn him into their yaoi-pet/backup-boyfriend. Fortunately for his sake, he graduated. Until summer vacation finally came, May kept asking Molly for hugs, and I’d interject and make up some excuse like “She was just telling me about some home life problems, she isn’t in the mood for a hug,” but the next time she sees her, May still approaches her in a zombie-like walk calling out “Hug~!”

Lots of other kids in anime club have complained about the 2, so as club president I’ll find an excuse to kick them out.

Tl;dr? May and Olivia, 2 insane weaboos, tried to form a harem and drag my unwilling friends into it.